How to Stop Being Shy and Overcome Shyness

Many of us have grown up being shy and suffer when meeting new people so here are some tips to overcome being shy and have a better life.

Overcoming shyness in our teenage years was something we worried about greatly but even as adults some people still suffer. We’ve been there before where we are invited to a party or a business meeting and hardly know anyone there and because we suffer from shyness it just doesn’t fill us with confidence so here are some tips to stop being shy that will help all people including children (boys and girls) and even your wife if you believe she is painfully shy in her life

So what can be done ?

Well most of this boils down to self confidence of course in that if you go into a room full of new people you just don’t know what to say but in reality those others want to know about you.

It’s the same if you have to do a presentation in front of people and you get stage fright but the fact remains is that your audience wants to hear from you – the expert.

Some of us suffer from not being able to articulate things very well (in that you find it difficult to describe facts about you because the words simply do not flow) and we have some tips to overcome that situation.

Building self confidence

If you are shy here are some tips to help you in your daily life.

• Be confident – if people are always knocking you about your looks and appearence or abilities then either ignore them in your mind or stand up to them. Often bullies continue bothering people because the person being bullied doesn’t take a stand – verbally. If you say to the person who is being negative towards you that either “your words really don’t hurt me at all” or “thank you for your comments I will take them on board” without emotion then things may get better (the worst is to rise to the bait)
• Read books – if you are finding it difficult to articulate things about you, what you have done during the day or something at work it might mean you need more words in your mind that you can use to describe yourself. We have found this with people who don’t read and many of the words they are using are short and practically non descriptive. Changes will occur over many weeks so try and get stuck into a book of fiction. If you hate reading please try and find the time as you may find you will enjoy it. Many libraries offer books for free so money should not be an issue.
• List 5 things about yourself. If you have 5 things you enjoy or hobbies then list them and write 3 paragraphs about those on a piece of paper. This means when people say to you “hi, how are you” you can reply with something like “yes I am fine today and I have really enjoyed going to the game as my team won and …. etc” – this will engage you in a conversation and people will be interested in what you say.
• Remember others may be shy also – this is something we often forget in that when meeting new people the other person may also be suffering from shyness and have the same problems (have you ever met someone and they hardly say anything back to you? It’s not that they don’t like you rather than it’s probably that they are shy and not confident either)
• You will need to make an effort – remember the saying “you get out of life what you put into it” ? Well it holds true here. If you are constantly going out and meeting new people even if it’s just to the supermarket or local starbucks you’ll meet people and strike up conversations. The more you do this the more you’ll also have to talk about with others.

So there are some basics you can work on in a small attempt to overcome being shy although changes are not going to happen overnight because most people who suffer from shyness are not necessarily extrovert characters. Try and do things. Join a club and you’ll meet new people who may become close friends eventually. If you have any additional tips on how to stop being shy then let us know below.

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